Things That Piss Me the Fuck Off Tuesday: 10.31.2017: The First EXCLUSIVE Halloween Edition!

Keep reading-don’t let anyone stop you.  –Maximum Ride:  The Angel Experiment

My brothers + sisters of the Universal Social Scene:

This is the very first annual Halloween blog special that I’ve ever done in my 9 years of blogging.  I’m just going to jump into what pisses me the fuck off this week, and, as for y’all, just fasten your seatbelts, because it’s a killer Thriller ride tonight.  Let’s get started with a certain ratchet bitch by the last name of DeVos:

http://vntyfr.com/YtgZVj9

Look at that bitch, all dressed for Halloween.  Way to ruin Halloween, bitches!  That had pissed me the fuck off so bad, I wish I could dress up as them next year, post the pictures on social media and see how they’d feel if I fucked up their shit by impersonating O. 45 + Pennywise’s two of their three main lying-ass hoes.  Ugh, I have no words for this horrid motherfucking catastrophe.  Do you dig me, my USS brethren?  No words.

What’s pissed me off worse than that:  The motherfucking NY’ers getting plowed by an Uzbekistani asshole today…..  I know one thing about a future in a country named Panem:  If we don’t get out and impeach all the bitches and pimps out….we will be Panem, and that’s my final say on this.  Please don’t tell me I didn’t ever tell you so, just believe me on this actual thing.  [By the way, if I actually misspelled what a resident of Uzbekistan wholly, please tell me, because I type quickly when upset, so I’m sorry +Thank you in Advance.  Damn…]

Over the course of the last time I blogged, which I can’t recall for shit, I got replacement copies of musicals and other music albums, the seven book collection of A Song of Ice + Fire, + the 2 Black Widow YA novels.  I don’t even know what’s wrong with the camera on this device, but I’ll figure something out, you dig me?

As for the my Dearly Beloved public library, which is getting a renovation 5 years overdue, starting 6 days from now, there’s going to be free books at the rear of the place this Saturday, so, it’s going to be a huge book haul on Tumblr, Instagram, Facebook, and, of course, on here, too, if I please to.  So many books, so little time.  I can’t wait to show you my haul that day; it’s just so exciting to have free books!  Especially when it’s on the first Saturday of November, Yay!

Before I get off, please be safe, be kind, and be vigilant on assholes, not teenagers, tonight!  Until tomorrow,

Ashley.

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Fiesty Frisky Friday: 10.06.2017: The Time Flies Way Too Fast When You’re Working Your Ass Off For What’s Needed Edition

…I am one of the few people in our happy little family willing to own up to what they did.  -Stephen King, Rita Hayworth + Shawshank Redemption, from Different Seasons: Four Novellas

It’s going to be a long night of reading to Classical music celebrating Autumn tonight, that is, if I don’t get my ass some sleep first.  But, before I start reading, here’s the recap of this week:

Monday, I ripped George off again, this time I cried like a bitch, then put myself into accountability through my bipolar talking shit on the last couple blog posts….on purpose, to teach my ass a lesson on Tuesday.  Wednesday + yesterday were better, though.

This morning….was the giftiest bitch of all.  Mother Nature paid a weekly visit, thank God.  I was unprepared, like usual, but it didn’t mean I wasn’t ready to face it again.  So, it may be WTMI for y’all, but it’s likely that by Happiness Hemp Day next week that the bleeding stops, and then next Feisty Frisky Friday will be over for ‘nother month.  Yaaaaaay.  [BTW, if I said too much on the Mother Nature subject, I’m sorry.]

One of my replacement copies for the first two books I ordered three years ago, the Penguin Classics Deluxe Edition of The Tale of Genji by Lady Murasaki Shikibu, is way surprisingly likely to be in my mail tomorrow, so another yay for me, too.  My replacement copy of The Complete Poems of Emily Dickinson will be here by either Monday or Tuesday next week.  The week after that, is my 7-volume A Song of Ice + Fire  collection will be in my mail!  Isn’t this beautiful tonight, mis amores?!  I’m so ecstatic about my books coming in the mail.  The upcoming 5 leather bound books [A Song of Ice + Fire] will be up to order by Monday, October 23; I already paid my cell phone bill very early, so that’ll be my reward for waiting on saving every damn $21 left over.  Then, once the next Monday comes by, Bernie is getting a shave off.  Then, by December 30, he will get shaved again, and every two months after by the near end of the month.  No exceptions nor excuses.  The reason why I make sure my shit is front and center in justified format is because straight lines on blog are cool.  Jagged…not so much, in my eyes.  Door closed and calmness reigning over the place, it’s time for me to jet to my reading out of my 4.5 year slump!  See you tomorrow!

Ash Dixon.

 

Things That Take My Breath Away Thursday: 10.05.07: The Art of Reading Is A Sexy Thang Edition

I’d bolted through a closing door/and I would never find myself being bored…  -Pet Shop Boys, Being Boring

It’s been an astoundingly busy couple of days, and all I can say about today is that I’m grateful for all my good efforts, which have replaced my bad efforts in the most beneficially astounding way.  I don’t want to leave this place for another because, honestly, I’d have nothing to do and I’d be stuck in a house all day, trying to search for better, if that happens….again, frankly.  I’m never going to be used to moving around, trust me.  I can’t explain how comfortable I’ve become in my own headquarters.  Back when I was a preteen until days before I turned 22 years old, I couldn’t even fucking do shit with myself.  That was suicidal boredom.  [By the way, if I were Mexican, being raised by Grandma would have been worse than being black, holler if you hear me!]  Now that I’m with my Mom + Pops, with no need to be raised any longer, my life is way easier to bear.  Having to watch my own back can be a bitch, though, when it comes to my food and privacy, but, other than those, I’m fine now.

Now that my reminisce about my days with Grandma is over with, lemme update you with what was on the agenda with my neighbor, Georgie:  He needed some cat litter for his kitten, Cali.  I bought some $13 at the Pet’s Barn, returned it to said supply store, bought a 20 pounder bag for $5, and went to the Big 8 for 99-cent baking soda; in between those, were the 12 cans of Blue Buffalo cat food, the catnip-laced Temptations cat treats, and 2 apples, having me earn $10 for the whole shebang of shit I put up with.  I had already put up a whole load of cans of pop in the fridge, in case he didn’t tell me to do so before (and I forgot!).  I get a second chance with Carl’s Jr.’s Breakfast Burger (yesterday, Mom ate my first one, God bless her, anyway!), since George wasn’t too interested in it.  At least it won’t be so greasy tonight.  *musical chuckle*.

I’m installing 30 updates into my apps on my Samsung Galaxy J3 Prime cell phone right now.  Tonight is going to be a very long night, especially when I have to watch what I eat around my son, Otis James William Smith-Kincaid (yes, my Chihuahua wants what I eat; holla if you hear me!).  I can’t always go apeshit on him, otherwise the animal control is on my ass for that, okay?  I can only tolerate so much of the little one.

I just washed myself before I went on typing this.  So, here’s the agenda, once I add this to my posted roster as no. 100:  Get off the keyboard, turn off my Spotify, go to my bed, read my book, go to sleep by 9 pm tonight.  So, I’ll update tomorrow, if anything.  See you on the 5 am up stretch.

Ash.

Things That Piss Me The Fuck Off Tuesday: 10.03.2017: The “Will the Next Chester Bennington Please Stand Up?” Edition, Part 2

I Found Bliss In Ignorance -Linkin Park, One Step Closer

Before anyone starts scolding my ass on the first part, what I wrote on there was very sad but also very true.  I can’t believe I took 8 aspirin yesterday over what had actually happened, which, in turn, is my fault, but still, I take full responsibility for what I wrote, whether I want to explain or not.  So, please forgive the raw emotion I put into the first part of the post, but also remember the reasons why I said what I said earlier.  My life ain’t worth fucking up over what is my damn fault.  If I’m such a scam artist, then why can’t I just be hired to scam the Republicans out of their selfish shit?  That way, they’ll feel what George felt when I scammed him, and only then will they work as janitors for the same schmeasly motherfucking minimum wage we’ve had for years.  Am I right?  But, then again, it’s still my fault for the dumb shit I put everyone through, and…..this damn dose of my own medicine is at its bitterest right now, that, honestly, I’m getting the worry that I’m going to be stuck in the damn house all damn day until a miracle happens, like I get struck by lightning, and the lightning breaks my leg, for instance.  If I believe that there’s going to be a next time for me and him……I better think again, to be honest.  There’s a fat chance for a next time.  And then there’s the sick feeling of staying home all day for the rest of the week, except for dog walks and mailbox checks, after I get or had gotten fired, which is probably what happened yesterday.  Lemme not think about stripping for $100s and shit; that is senselessly useless.  Nobody wants me to be a stripper in community college, so, fuck it.  That ho shit is out the list.  I need to find something more beautiful than this dumb trouble I’m in so I’m able to get out of it, once and for all.  Right now, I can’t explain how much of a stupid bitch I am.  I just fucking can’t.

Ash.

Things That Piss Me The Fuck Off Tuesday: 10.03.2017: The “Will the Next Chester Bennington Please Stand Up?” Edition

I’m One Step Closer To the Edge/And I’m About To Break…  -Linkin Park, One Step Closer

This lyric has hit home too many times.  Yesterday was one of them.  I ripped someone off way more than I should have, which is never, and now I wish I had the ability to rip every Republican out of their money, savings accounts included.  In other words:  I wish I didn’t.  It led me to thinking suicidally, which led to many people in my mind going to visit my grave over something that ultimately the fucking truth, which is the bitterest dose of my own medicine to date.  It pissed me off so badly, I slammed doors and nearly broke holes in the wall.  Yes, I relapsed myself.  Was it necessary or uncalled-for?  It was very self-disrespectful, and totally uncalled-for.  Was it worth the destructive behavior I caused towards Father?  Absolutely not.  Will yesterday teach me a hugely valuable lesson in lesbianism, poverty, loneliness, and old age?  If I don’t force-feed myself this damn bitter dose of my own bullshit, then yes.  Yes it will, every damn motherfucking day for the rest of my life.  The taste is so shitty and so bitter, that it’s really going to motherfucking stain me for a long, long, long, long time.  I better teach myself how not to steal ever again, even if it means having to take 3 hours of long walks in the park without my cell phone in my presence every day to prevent any future destructive behaviors inside this place or anywhere else for that matter, even if it means having to play loud ass heavy metal to calm myself down, even if it means just not saying or doing anything stupid anymore by forcing myself into walking in extremely cold weather, and hope to God I don’t die of hypothermia….that is, if people don’t find me first.  I just…..need to fucking find something else to do for work, otherwise my life is over and there’s nothing I can do about it.  The life I’ll be forced to live is filled with stripping, lesbians, poverty…..and……if I don’t want any of that……..Now is the time for me to grow up, otherwise the hard way will claim a new victim very soon enough.  Nobody I have in my life will want me anymore if I become a force-fed lesbian from jail.  My own medicine is so fucking bitter.  I wish it just wasn’t, but I’ll eat my own sin and my own bullshit, anyway.  It’s the only fucking way I’ll woman up to everything I did wrong.  Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to cry…..yet again.  I’m sorry.

 

Ash.